


The Lies My Mind Tells Me

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Gencio [8]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Apologies, Blood and Injury, Capgras, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Head Injury, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, M/M, Memories, Missions Gone Wrong, Nightmares, Serious Injuries, Trauma, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-19
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-22 13:07:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17060348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: “Now tell me where Lúcio is.” The words cracked out like a whip, and Lúcio flinched, even as disbelief and hurt washed over him. He was about to chide his partner after all this was no time for jokes, not after he had spent days waiting for Genji to wake up, but the words died on his lip as Genji met his gaze once more. There was danger in that gaze. A Dragon stirring in the depths.He meant what he was saying.A mission gone wrong has devastating consequences.





	The Lies My Mind Tells Me

 

 

    Lúcio had never really minded the infirmary, the room that nearly every agent spoke of with dread, although never in Angela’s earshot. Instead, he found it a peaceful place to work, and even with the number of times, he’d ended up in here and not as a medic it had remained a sanctuary until now. For a moment his eyes drifted to the bandages wrapped around his left ankle. It was a minor injury, especially… he swallowed, and slowly lifted his head, turning his gaze to the reason why the infirmary was rapidly becoming his least favourite place, swallowing back a sound that was a little too close to a sob as he studied Genji.

_Especially, when it should have been much worse…_

    His partner was perfectly still on the hospital bed, surrounded by machines and wires that Lúcio knew by heart from working with Angela, and yet if anyone had asked him to name them right now, he wasn’t sure that he could have named a single one. Perhaps it was because of how they merged with Genji’s own wiring, a stark reminder of what he was and how much he had already been forced to endure, and Lúcio’s fingers were trembling as he reached out to trail them lightly over metal fingers and up an arm that now housed half a dozen wires. Genji looked lost like this, and he bit his lip, fighting the urge to rip them free. Instead, he traced their path back to the machines beeping softly around them, a morbid lullaby that had been his only companion apart from Angela’s frequent visit and Hana’s attempts to get him to leave for a little while to eat or shower – she hadn’t been foolish enough to try and get him to sleep.

    He hated the machines. The noise. Yet, right now they were the only thing reassuring him that Genji was still with him. That his partner was fighting, improving day by day, although he had yet to wake. Telling him that his mistake hadn’t cost him everything.

_Yet…_

    Lúcio swallowed, looking away, letting his fingers fall away from Genji’s arm, suddenly unsure whether he even had the right to still be touching him. _This is my fault…_ There were other voices, the reassurances from Angela that Genji was healing, that he would come back. The encouragement from Hana and Lena, as they’d guided him onto the plane at the end of the mission, supporting him when his legs had threatened to give way. The assurances from the entire team that it hadn’t been his fault when they had come to visit, no one pressing him to attend the debriefing. Hanzo’s quiet ‘thank you for bringing him home.’ The words were there, the reassurances, but they were a blur of white noise, lost beneath the weight of that single thought.

_This is my fault…_

_*_

     _Lúcio hissed as he pushed himself up, having to grip the corner of the wall to steady himself as his leg threatened to give way beneath him. Somehow he had managed to land on the  first floor, rather than falling all the way – small mercies, as a quick glance confirmed that the skate was done for, the hardlight flickering wildly, while the deep gash in the side from where his misjudged jump had connected with the rebar protruding from the partially demolished warehouse, was slowly turning bloody. Tearing his gaze away he took a deep breath, the pain beginning to register now that the shock was receding a little and it hurt…a lot, and he cursed under his breath, knowing that there was no way he was going to be getting out of here under his own steam._

 _“Lúcio?” Genji’s voice exploded in his ear, and the concern told him that his partner had caught at least some of the disastrous attempt to change direction when the Talon operatives had spotted him up on the wall. “Are you all right?”_   _Lúcio crushed the urge to lie, hating the concern and fear, and knowing that his mistake could cost them the mission, letting his forehead fall against the wall as he admitted between clenched teeth._

_“No.”_

_“I’m on my way.”_

_“No, the mission…”_ _Lúcio protested at once, knowing that they were barely coping as it was, and it was going to be bad enough with him out of action…if Genji was distracted too. They couldn’t afford to lose another payload, especially not this one, which had finally drawn Doomfist out into the field for the first time since his escape. “I can wait…it’s not life-threatening.” It hurt like hell, to the point where he could feel his vision beginning to waver a little, but it could wait. He could wait, and the mission was…_

_“We’re fine down here,” Lena cut in over the cons, sounding just as cheerful as ever, and they both heard the whirr of the chronal accelerator a split second before gunshots rang over the comms, and there was a moment of silence, before they heard the distinctive sound of her guns, and then she was speaking again. “Genji, get him out of here.”_

_“Understood.”_

_“No….” His protest fell on deaf ears, and as he turned, nearly ending up in a heap on the ground, he saw the distinctive flash of silver and green on the opposite side of the road heading quickly in his direction. Sighing in defeat, he let himself slump against the wall, closing his eyes for a moment as the world was starting to move a little out of sync, adding to the nausea that was building alongside the pain. I screwed up… he wasn’t even sure what had happened, it was a jump he had performed countless times, he’d had enough speed and…_

_Hearing movement, he opened his eyes, startled that Genji had reached him so quickly – or maybe he had been lost in his thoughts longer than he’d… Surprise, became horror in a split second as he took in the figure looming over him even with the distance that remained between them. He had never met the man, but he had watched the news footage and the old mission date over and over, wanting to know as much as he could about the man who had almost killed Genji when he was arrested, and his mouth went dry as dark eyes met his gaze._

_Akande Ogundimu._

_Doomfist._

_He tasted copper as he forced himself to straighten, biting back a shout of pain as he put weight on his ankle, feeling it wavering dangerously beneath him. His eyes flickered from side to side, searching for an escape, already knowing that he didn’t have a change… he wasn’t even sure that he could move, let alone try and dodge whatever was coming his way. Realising this, his attention shifted back to Doomfist, and he lifted his head high, praying that his fear wasn’t written across his face. This was the man who had almost killed Genji and Lena. The man who had predicted Lena’s movement when few of them managed to do so even with all the time training together. The man who had left Genji in Angela’s clutches for over a month, whe_ n _Lúcio had only beaten his partner a handful of times in their sparring sessions._

_He didn’t stand a chance, but…_

_“I thought you were smarter than this,” it came out more strained than he’d intended, the pain evident in his voice, but his voice didn’t break, and right now he was taking that as a victory. Especially, as Doomfist moved forwards at his words, blank-faced, nothing to show that his words had struck home, but at least his attention was on_ Lúcio _and not the team below, and for now, that was all that he could hope for. He spread his arms wide, keenly aware of the absence of his weapon, wondering where it had landed when he fell, knowing that he wasn’t going to get a chance to find out as the blank expression, gave way to one that he recognised all too well from the fight against Vishkar. The triumph of a predator that had its prey exactly where he wanted it, only this time he had nothing to counter it with, just words and a hope that he could buy the others the time they needed and a prayer that Genji would turn back. “As we speak your target is slipping through your fingers. You’re going to lose, and for what? A medic with no weapons, and an injured foot.” He could hear his partner’s voice in the back of his head, railing at him for being stupid, for admitting that weakness to someone who was known for hating weakness, he ignored it, and straightened, baring his teeth in a bloody grin. “You chose the wrong target.”_

_Doomfist was closer now, and Lúcio was increasingly aware of their proximity and the size of his opponent, but it was the quiet that got to him. The other man was still perfectly calm, although there had been a brief flicker of something in his last words. The silence was unnerving, and he knew the moment that his composure gave way, because triumph flickered across the blank face, lost in the whirring noise that filled the air, as the gauntlet that he had been trying to ignore began to glow._

_Lúcio moved. There was no other choice. He knew that his chances were slim to none, but he had never been one to sit around and accept his weight. However, even before pain lanced up his leg, the hardlight finally crumbling away and sending him tumbling to the ground, he knew he wasn’t going to make it, and hearing the gauntlet discharge, and the battle cry as his assailant rocketed forward, he squeezed his eyes shut. Genji, I’m sorry…_

_“Lúcio!” There was a hand against his back, shoving him forwards towards the edge and out of the path of the attack. He had no chance to catch himself, and gravity did the rest, even as he heard the heavy impact behind him…the voice that had called his name in terror seconds before raised in a scream. Lúcio twisted as he fell, straining to see his partner, but unable to see anything but the dust rising into the air in a cloud above him and the rubble following him down…and then the ground was rushing up to meet him, taking the world with it, apart from one final, desperate thought._

_Genji…_

_*_

   A pained noise drew him out of the memory, and for a moment he thought that it had come from him, but then he caught movement out of the corner of his eye, and he twisted towards it. Ignoring the aches and pains that the movement ignited, and glad that he had, as he saw Genji’s fingers twitch against the bed, mirrored by movement beneath closed eyelids.

“Genji…” He breathed. Part of him wanted to flee, not sure that he was ready to face his partner after what had happened…to see the full effect of his mistake. However, that would have been the coward’s way out, and Genji was shifting, fingers biting into the sheet and instead he leant forward, wanting to make sure that he was the first thing that Genji would see when he finally opened his eyes, unable to stop the tiny smile creeping across his lips as his partner wrinkled his nose. Just as reluctant to wake up now, as he was on the rare mornings when they could remain entangled under the covers for a little longer than normal. “Can you open your eyes for me?” He encouraged, reaching out to grasp Genji’s hand, squeezing lightly as Genji’s eyes danced beneath closed lids again, before he was finally rewarded with a glimpse of brown.

    It disappeared a second later, but before he could panic, Genji blinked once, twice and then managed to open his eyes fully. “Welcome bac…” His voice trailed off as Genji’s gaze drifted towards the sound of his voice, only there wasn’t the warmth or relief he had been expecting. In fact, there was nothing. Genji’s entire expression, which had been one of sleepy confusion a second before had gone blank, and Lúcio was caught by surprise when his partner ripped his hand free. “Genji…?”

     The entire bed rattled with the force of Genji’s movement, and without thinking, Lúcio lunged forward to stop him before he could tear his stitches or yank out the wires, even though he had wanted to do just that a few minutes before. “Genji!” His fingers had barely brushed Genji’s shoulder when there was a sudden blinding pain in his cheek, and it was only when he tasted blood on his lips that he realised what had just happened. He couldn’t move, frozen in place by sheer disbelief, trembling fingers closing on thin air as Genji moved out of range.

_Genji hit me?_

    He blinked, lifting a shaking hand to his mouth. When he pulled his fingers away, they were speckled with blood, and he swallowed before turning his attention back to Genji. His partner had made it off the bed while he was distracted, numerous wires lying loose and torn around him, sparking in places and Lúcio knew that alarms had to be blaring in Angela’s office. Shaking his head, and biting back a wince, he studied Genji, terrified that he might have hurt himself, but considering his injuries the other man was frighteningly steady on his feet, his entire frame tense and braced as though for combat, his gaze locked onto Lúcio. “G-Genji?” Angela had warned that there might be some issues when he first woke up. Nanites could deal with a lot, but the brain was delicate, and she had made sure that Lúcio was prepared for that opportunity…but she hadn’t prepared him for this, and he could feel himself trembling as Genji glanced away for a second, taking in the infirmary. There was recognition, which was a relief, but Genji didn’t seem comforted by the familiar surroundings as his gaze shot back to Lúcio. “G-Genji, what is going on?” His voice cracked and wavered, in a way that it hadn’t when faced with Doomfist and he could feel his hands shaking worse than before.

“Where am I?” Genji demanded, tone flat, not reacting at all to the waver in Lúcio’s voice. It was his voice, and yet it sounded nothing like the Genji that Lúcio knew – nothing like the warm whispers that greeted him in the morning, or the teasing tone that needled and encouraged him in equal measure, or the softness that only he got to hear, and he found himself taking a cautious step back despite himself.

“The Watchpoint,” Lúcio replied.  “In the infirmary.” _Where the hell is Angela?_ Something was wrong, something bad, although as the dark gaze left him for a moment to sweep the room, he saw the same hint of recognition from before and he tried to seize onto to that. Maybe it had just been the disorientation of waking up in a different place, after all, the last thing Genji probably remembered was being in the field, and it was that thought that gave him the courage to try again. “Genji, you’re home…you’re safe.”

“Maybe.”

“Maybe?”

“Now tell me where Lúcio is.” The words cracked out like a whip, and Lúcio flinched, even as disbelief and hurt washed over him. He was about to chide his partner after all this was no time for jokes, not after he had spent days waiting for Genji to wake up, but the words died on his lip as Genji met his gaze once more. There was danger in that gaze. A Dragon stirring in the depths.

He meant what he was saying.

“Genji…” He spread his arms, just as he had with Doomfist, and that parallel made his heart ache, especially when it was met with an equally impassive expression from his partner. “It’s me. I’m right here.” He didn’t understand what going on. There had been part of him that was terrified that Genji wasn’t going to want anything to do with him after what had happened, but this…this was a hundred times worse than he’d expected. Taking a deep breath, he took a hobbling step forward, still keeping his arms spread, trying not to appear threatening. “Genji, please…I’m right here.” Genji wavered for a second, and Lúcio panicked as he saw his partner sway, losing what little colour he had, the situation appearing to finally be catching up with him and he didn’t think about it, lunging forward to try and catch him before he could fall. “Genji! Athena, we need Angela…” He wasn’t given a chance to say anything else as Genji came to life again at his touch, more machines beginning to wail as his partner slammed into him, catching him off guard and bearing them both to the ground.

     Fingers – some metal, others flesh bit into his arms, trapping him in place, not that he could fight back right now for fear of causing more damage to Genji. Instead, he froze, meeting Genji’s gaze and frantically searching for some sign of recognition, something to show that Genji knew that he was there, but there was nothing…No, not nothing… the dangerous glint he had spied before was burning bright, and turning to fury, and as the grip on his arms became a little too bruising he cracked, words coming out in a breathless sob.

“Meu Anjo!” There was a flinch, the endearment making Genji flinch for a second. It was just a second though, and Lúcio cried out in alarm as Genji moved, bearing down on him, as his metal arm moved to press against his throat. With one arm frees, Lúcio scrabbled against the arm, trying to push it back, but Genji was relentless, eyes alight with a fire that Lúcio had never seen before and there were tears on his cheeks as he felt the arm pressing harder. “Minha Vida. Por Favor…Por Favor…”

 


End file.
